Last week I had the privilege of serving at leadership training conference. The breakout leaders had a series of questions to tackle that came from the women in attendance. As we gathered around the table, our leader read one question aloud, "What would you say to a young mom who says she doesn't have time to be in the Word?"
All eyes shifted to me, a young mom who has often thought, when in the world am I going to have a quiet time when there isn't even any quiet?
I'm a young-ish woman who has had seasons of being in and out of the Word. A woman who knows where to find bread but has skipped her spiritual breakfast for whole seasons at a time. A woman who has feared condemnation but found grace over and over again in the word no matter how long it's been. A young mom who's been woken up multiple times in the night and the thought of getting up early is not even a thought because at that point, you don't even have coherent thoughts. A young mom who feels like her attention is being pulled in a thousand different directions. A young mom who has things that need to get done and used to think a quiet time with God is one of them, a thing to get done.
To you... to me... I say this:
What do you want?
If you're like me, there's probably a million things you want. I want to sleep for 5 straight days but will settle for at least 8 straight hours. I want my laundry to fold itself. I want my kids to eat the food in front of them and be thankful for it. I want time to slow down so life isn't passing by so quickly. I want my home to be more clutter-free. I want to have a shower. I want to be present with my husband, and present with my kids.
But the tyranny of the urgent beckons and I've given in to it enough times. I've gotten to the end of a day and the end of season and come up empty handed.
So, what do I really want?
I want to love God more than I desire anything else in this world. I want to love people. I want to make disciples, little ones and big ones. I want love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control to flow because of the Holy Spirit's presence in me. I want my blink of an eye life on this earth to have eternal significance. I want people to know the love and forgiveness of Jesus. I want to recognize His presence in my everyday life. I want my life to overflow from being with the wellspring of life in everything. I want people to be more convinced that God is for them when they are with me. I want my family to follow Him. I want to see people set free. I want to follow Him.
There's lots of things we both want. But each season, each day, each moment, you and I are faced with this question, what do you want more?
It's a question our lives will answer whether or not we ever say the words aloud.
"Therefore, since Christ suffered in the flesh, EQUIP YOURSELVES with the same RESOLVE- because the one who SUFFERED in the flesh has FINISHED with sin in order to live the remaining time in the flesh no longer for human desires but for GOD'S WILL. For there has already been ENOUGH time spend in doing what the pagans choose to do." (1 Peter 4:1-3)
What are you going to do?
This life, this season, this day needs resolve to spend the remaining time differently.
The kind of resolve that says, I'm finished with sin. I'm finished with needing to be in control, because Someone else already is. I'm finished with needing the plan first because He who called me is faithful and He will do it. I'm finished with taking responsibility for everything and everyone else's stuff because He has simply invited me to self-control. I'm finished with being afraid to fail, lose, be uprooted, be wrong, or come up short, because I have the Word of God before me and Holy Spirit within me to convict, lead, guide, teach and empower me.
How do I know all of that? Because it's in the Word. He is the Word. In His Word I get to know Him and I will continue to know Him. He will continue to blow my mind. He invites me to believe Him. The kind of life I live here depends on how much I'm willing to believe Him.
And listen, I've not woken up at 5:30 AM every day for the last 5 years with my nose in the Word. I'm not talking about a perfect schedule. I'm talking about the inclination of your heart. Through my spiritual winters, He's given me the longing simply because I asked for it.
My want wanders but I've asked Him for resolve and desire for Him that I cannot muster up myself and to fix my eyes on Him when I'm distracted by everything temporary.
Whatever it is you want, you will find yourself getting after it.
But I promise you this, whatever you really want, it's in Him. It's from doing life with Him.
It's starts with saying to Him, I confess to you that I want the things of this world more than I want you. I will not find what I really want anywhere but in you. Forgive me.
Our lives have intersected, perhaps for the sole purpose of seeking Him first together.
If you want to be changed by him as you're changing diapers, let's go.
You have to do this next part. Right now, ask Him to change your want. Go open your Bible and meet Him. (Start in John if you need a place). Ask Him to teach you. And let's get onto doing life with Him.
Stay tuned as we will talk about how!